Tuesday, August 21, 2007

The Three Bears - The Real Story

A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning.....

Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table, and he looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?" he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?!?" he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, "For God's sake, how many times do we have to go through this with you idiots? It was Mummy Bear who got up first.It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house. It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee. It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away. It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper and croissants. It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table. It was Mummy Bear who put the bloody cats out, cleaned the litter boxes, gave the cats their food, and refilled their water. And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, becauseI'm only going to say this once.............................................

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I HAVEN'T MADE THE FUCKING PORRIDGE YET!!!

13 comments:

Kate said...

Hah! I love that!

Tania said...

LOL ... classic! Am looking forward to your detox updates and thanks so much for sparing us the photos!

zara said...

love it!

Jo said...

Hey Jules

Thanks for your kind comment on my blog - things are all up and down, but todays an UP day, so gotta be happy with that. Actually, since I've gotten back on the 'good eating' horse, its been alot better. Hmmmm.... a pattern emerges, methinks!

Anyway, not sure if you are still doing the 4 week challenge thing, but my weight today (in the afternoon, AFTER lunch) is 82.8, so a gain of 400gms.

Should have weighed in the morning, but completely forgot.

Hope you are feeling ok, chicken.

xo

Chris H said...

Hell I feel guilty... I sit up in bed EVERY morning, with my laptop... and wait for my Latte to be delivered.... while 'he' feeds the kids, makes the lunches etc etc.....EXCEPT on sunday when I let him sleep in. *HANGING HEAD IN SHAME* Can I just say in my defense .... I TRAINED HIM RIGHT!

Kitty said...

Hahahahaahahahahahahahahahahaha

59.1kg thank you please

Lynda said...

Very good.... lol

Anne said...

Funny woman!

Thanks for the tip about the peppermint tea, think it is helping! You don't tell me it tasted like crap though!

Jenniy said...

LOL That's great!

Chubbymum said...

OMG I am laughing my bloody head off he he he that is sooo funny.

Chubbymum
http://cmlosingit.blogpost.com

Taylor_John said...

Hi Jules, got connected through from Steph's site long time ago for some reason and have lurked here for about two months now but today I had to come out just to say....that was bloody funny as! I relate in a half/half manner. Some days I get up and do all the stuff, other days I'm too arsed to be bothered to get out of bed to do it. Probably from the late night surfing on the internet. Those are the mornings of the 8.30am rise to get the rush of kids to school by 8.35 so they arrive at 8.45am. You can imagine what I look like but minus the dressing gown, fag hanging out the mouth and shower cap still on head. I do glam up a little. LOL.

Mellisa said...

*claps* Well done!! lol

airlie said...

ooh - damn! i thought that it was going to end with mummy bear eating all three coz she needed the carbs or something!